Weird stuff #1 - After nearly 36 years, I finally got up the nerve to taste a green olive. NEVER have had the desire but was recently talked into it. To me, they just looked plain gross. They're a little salty, but actually, not too bad - if they're in a dish with other stuff. Not sure I'd sit there & eat 'em one by one though.
Weird stuff #2 - Also recently convinced to cut a lettuce head into quarters & dip the whole wedge into a bowl of dressing. REALLY? But - I did it, just because. Jessica thought I was a total retard... I think it actually made it taste better :) How weird is that?
Weird stuff #3 - I like to walk, by myself, back & forth on the gravel outside my home. It calms me.
Weird stuff #4 - I kindof miss the south. I never thought I'd say that. EVER. But I do.
5/27/09
Weird Stuff
Just Thinking...
I thought a lot yesterday, (Memorial Day), but didn't get online to post anything until today.
I was simply, but deeply, thinking about how grateful I am for my heroes. 
Yay :)
I'm happy to say that I have lost over 20 pounds since the end of January. I've also managed to stay off my anxiety & sleeping meds since then too.
Sometimes strength comes from the most unexpected places, at the most unexpected times. And it did for me.
Maybe one day I'll be able to get rid of the Zoloft too. That might be a little more difficult, since I've been on it for 15 years & still have some things I'm dealing with. But miracles do happen. I know that all too well.
Baby steps, & tincture of time...
5/25/09
I Love Weddings...
I admit - yes, I'm married, but I Google wedding dresses (& cakes) quite a bit. I didn't have the dress I really wanted, but such is life. When you have no money... you have no money :) You get what you can afford, right? Oh well...
And aren't we all grateful that styles have changed since 17 years ago! Look at this fru-fru dress I wore - And what's up with those massive poofy sleeves? Blegh! It was great for the early 90's - I guess...
Weddings just make me happy. I've done flowers for a couple of weddings & helped decorate the cakes, which was a lot of fun.
If I'm ever left to support my kids on my own... maybe this is what I'll do. Who knows. These are awesome cakes. I just realized they're all chocolate :) Hm.....
With a daughter nearing that age in 2 or 3 years (oh dear...) it's fun to scope what's out there. I love simple... but elegant. I guess I'm allowed to look anyway, cause I've gotta find something gorgeous for me to wear too, right? I mean... 4 kids - 4 weddings to dress up for!
Yah yah yah, I kinda sometimes imagine myself in a new wedding dress - (I know, I'm a retard) But really, I can't wait to see my daughter, all beautiful, in the dress of her dreams... 
My favorite rings are the 'tension' rings... The kind where it looks like the diamond is floating. Very simple, but I love them! 
Can't forget the flowers. Although I love all different kinds, my personal favorites are hydrangeas, calalilies, daisies, tulips, & roses. THEN, I would totally add honeysuckle to everything. I LOVE honeysuckle! They're cute, & they smell sooo good. 
A couple of links to check out:
www.fayeandgreer.blogspot.com
http://weddings.theknot.com/Real-Weddings/Cake/results.aspx?type=3&wedding_details=Cake
5/24/09
Chillin' At Church
This is us... waiting for dad to finish up his stuff after church. No exciting stories here. Just our normal day, once a week. Bored, tired, hungry, & taking silly photos of each other - cause there's nothing else to do.
***NOTE: Due to totally stupid facial expression on the mom, face has been 'scratched' out - with permission to only show the new dress & shoes she got for Mother's Day :) - which, by the way, she did receive multiple compliments on! 
Jessica & her cute little social self.
My frog daughter (...weird)
The mom (...that would be me - the one with a dress, shoes, & no face) 
James - proud that the kids sang to him for turning 5 years old.
Jessica & Chylanne wishing we were gone by now.
5/21/09
'DEEPISH' THOUGHTS...
Yah, I've been thinking today. Maybe a little too much. I've been thinking how my children are growing up so fast. How my life is flying by, and sometimes I think I'm hanging on by the seat of my pants.
Am I a good mom? Did I teach my babies the way I wanted to? Have I done everything, or WILL I do everything I've hoped to accomplish before the Lord decides my life is done?
Do I have everything that I've ever truly wanted?
Some days I feel selfish. I wanna just take care of me & only me. Only those things that I've always wanted or hoped for... and forget about everyone else. Is that allowed?
Of course, I don't do it. I continue to be a mom. And I continue to be as selfless as I possibly can & give of myself every day to those who are most important.
I think I've failed a few too many times... Sometimes I feel like I (moms...) kindof get lost in the fog & wonder which direction we're really going. Actually, I've felt that way a lot lately. Maybe it's just the time of year. Anxious to leave the dark winter behind me & walk into the sunshine of spring for a breath of fresh air. I need a lot of it.
I always call my children my babies. They aren't really babies anymore. But they will always... always... always be my babies. One of my favorite Children's books is: "Love You Forever" by Robert Munsch. The part that means the most to me is...
"I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always,
As long as I'm living, My baby you'll be."
Those words have a special place, in a deep little corner of my heart, for personal reasons that are just mine. BUT...
As I have rocked my 4 children to sleep over the years, I would just stare at their little faces. I still do. I'm ever so grateful every time that God trusted me to be their mom. Why me? Why did I deserve these perfect little spirits? They are my life, and I would do anything for them. But am I doing enough?
When I am old, & they are growing old... they will still be my babies. They will always be my babies.
I guess today, I just wanna be someone's baby. I wanna be rocked & held & comforted in my safe place. In my own little heaven. Do you ever feel homesick, even when you are at home? Today, this is me.
Maybe tonight as I sleep, I can dream about it & pretend.
And maybe the dreams will be real enough that tomorrow, I'll wake up, climb out of bed, & with a smile on my face, know that I am doing my best - for those that matter most.
It's worth the sacrifice. It's worth the tears. It's worth the wait. Because, as someone very close to me taught me... "This is not about me. It's about them." No matter how hard it gets, they are my life. It's all for my babies.
Maybe that was more of a journal entry than a blog entry, but it's here. Maybe it makes sense to no one but me. But, somehow I think it helped... just a little.
5/19/09
Band & a Violin?
Chylanne wanted to play violin, but her school doesn't have orchestra. Soooo... her band teacher agreed to let her play violin in band. Sounded a little odd, but it worked out really well. She learned to play all on her own, & did a duet in church after only 3 1/2 months. She's kinda enjoyed getting noticed at her concerts, because she chose an aqua green violin, so it definitely stands out :)
Last night was her last concert. Grades 6-12 performed at the highschool. Her teacher handed out all of the end of year awards & trophies. She was awarded a pin for participation in the honors orchestra a few months ago (they trained for 1 day & performed that night)... And she also received the "outstanding student" trophy for her grade! We are so so proud of her!
Congratulations Chylanne!
At the Hospital
We visited the ER about 11pm Saturday night. Stayed up with her till morning, & they put her in the hospital. 3 ultrasounds, bloodtests, CT scan, & lots of pain meds later, they decided a golf ball sized cyst needed to be removed from her belly. During that surgery, they found her appendix having problems too. So between the OB surgeon & general surgeon, they finally got her taken care of. I'm sad when my kids are hurting... but very glad we caught it before she had worse problems.
In the ER still in lots of pain:
Before surgery:
After surgery, texting friends, & feeling better (obviously):
Mom relaxing in the hospital recliner :) Heh Heh!
5/16/09
Family Videos
Starting to post a video here & there of family stuff on You Tube... If you wanna see 'em, here's our page link:
www.youtube.com/user/fuzzleberry1973
5/13/09
The Falls
I love my babies :)
James had to pee. We were in the middle of nowhere, so here I am, helping him in the weeds... laughing so hard I could hardly keep myself standing up. I couldn't stop, cuz HE belly laughed the whole time. Poor kid made a 5 foot rainbow that lasted forever!
The falls were gorgeous today. Huge flow & beautiful weather made it picture perfect.
James... totally sick of taking pictures. 
5/7/09
The Things They Do...
Imagination has taken over. James folded his 'city' rug so he could ride on an airplane (rather intuitive, I think!) He also stacked his animals. Well... we figured he was trying to create a new species (maybe giraffosaurus?) but he told us he was just giving his giraffe a dinosaur back ride :)
Senior Banquet
Jessica & Chylanne served dinner to graduates at the 2009 senior banquet. The theme was 50's. Jessica went all out, & Chylanne took the more simple approach. Just had to catch a couple poses in for me on their way out to the car... Silly Girls! I think they were blinded by the headlights.
5/4/09
Silly James
Very very boy...
I think he will get hurt a lot as he grows up...
Boy toy...
His army tank is one of his favorite toys. He LOVES army stuff!
"Rock on freaky fro!"
